Method
Since narratives and dialogue are central concepts in my research I decided my method of research should reflect this. I consider my thesis to be a product of hermeneutic analysis (Gadamer 1975). Looking back it is mainly the conversations with students in my role as a student counsellor that affected the whole process. In this role I noticed and observed, which made me think. The experience of being a student and a teacher at the Royal conservatoire myself also helped. I became interested in reading about artists; biographies and interviews in newspapers and magazines. Of course I observed my own children growing up. They helped me understand how parent-child connections change while maturing and I used examples of their letters and drawings to show to students, to help them reflect. All these data were turned into text, which made me think and analyse again. While working on my thesis I was allowed to do a course outside school: Mentaliseren als psychotherapeutisch gereedschap [Mentalizing as a psychotherapeutic tool] (RINO-groep Utrecht) as an elective for the Master. It helped me to challenge my own ideas. The material I had at a certain point made me decide to focus on specific topics (see supplement 1: Topics for interview) which I turned into 10 questions, I could present to students. I asked several of the students that contacted me to do an interview, which - based on the questions - led to a conversation about the specific topics (see supplement 3: Response on interview questions). Finally I returned to my daughter. This time we were in a dialogical position, her helping me to visualize the layers in my essay and design the presentation of my thesis. The title page is an adult reflection of my daughter on her earlier letters being a child (see 2.2 Scripts), turned into a representation.
The essay presented below is a result of going through most of the steps described above several times, referred to by Gadamer (1975) as the hermeneutic circle. This of course makes my research different from strict empirical scientific research. I did not observe the objects of my research trough a one-way screen looking for objective information; I was in a dialogical position with them. The interviews were separate sessions in the contact between students and me. During these sessions I was in the role of the interviewer but they also knew me as their counsellor. This of course has its merits and its dangers. In my role as a student counsellor I’m familiar with taking a position where I don’t judge, don’t advice, don’t blame, don’t worry or feel too much pity for the students I am engaged with. This helped me to also take this position during the interview, which Kelchtermans (1994, p. 141) claims is vital for this type of research. Of course out of politeness students might give me the reply I’m looking for. At the same time it gives me a unique position, where I’m allowed in being connected on a deeper level (Catani 1981, p. 212). I’m convinced that I would not have come to the insights I present in this essay, without the experience of once being a student myself and being in a dialogical position with the students I met in my work as a student counsellor.
To illustrate my argumentation, throughout the essay I present the main layers of my inner dialogue during the whole process, inviting you as a reader to do the same and take some time to step out and reflect from a slightly different perspective while reading. In total there are five layers/types of parallel perspectives:
- The main text, my argumentation in which I describe the ideas I developed and for which I try to find theoretical support.
- Information that is not vital for my main argumentation but illustrates it from a different angle: articles from the newspapers, research in other fields, books, etc.
- Samples of cases from students that contacted me during the past years. Every detail that could reveal his or her identity is left out and in some cases I decided to change instrument or department to avoid connection to a specific person.
- Examples of specific responses from the interview (see 4: The interview) that could support my main argumentation.
- Examples of letters and drawings from my children to illustrate my argumentation.
My essay starts with my position as a student counsellor dealing with students that contact me because something interferes with their artistic development within the context of their education in Chapter 1. As a next step I take a bigger perspective by focussing on the concept of personal development in general in and even look for a connection between personal development and mental health in Chapter 2. With the concepts I derive from this wider perspective, I investigate how these can play a role in art. I observe the struggle an artist has on a personal level with its possible effect on his artistic work and also make a connection to mental health, in regard to art. This is presented in Chapter 3. In Chapter 4
I present and analyse the data of the interview. The general conclusions of my essay are presented in Chapter 5.
With the help of this essay I would like to give students insights, which might help them observe their motivations and possible hindrances concerning their artistic growth at a conservatoire or art academy. It could also help teachers to understand their students, which might improve their role as a coach within the artistic development of their students.