"Closed Eyes" Warm Up Research

Procedure

1. Walking around, listening and adjusting to the music.

2. Finding the beat and bouncing/falling/dropping on it with the steps, keeping it relaxed.

3. Finding your way to the center and building the bounce in terms of the intensity.

4. Whatever movements emerge from the bounce are welcome, as long as they are not forced on the body and are loose.

5. Activaitng the feet - sensing the ground with them with all surface (heels, toes, outside and inside surface).

6. Activating the hands - going to the ground and sliding with the hands, pushing away, pulling & giving weight (some exercises inspired from breakdance + also playing with all the surface of the hands).

7. Activating the whole body - floorwork exercises to feel the ground with all the posisble surface of the body.

8.Exploration of all 4s - hands and feet always on the ground - researching the possibilities.

9. Going back to standing up and activating the whole length of the arms by using popping.

10. Touching the air as if there is something in it, 360 degrees.

11. Touching and tracing the body with the hands.


General conditions

  • One song on repeat, a song that has steady beat  and that keeps the body at a certain pace, e.g. "Subzero - Original Mix by Ben Klock"
  • Consious trance
  • Sensing
  • One of the main points is to activate the body in a loose and relaxed way
  • The other main point is to activate the sense of touch of the hands and feet so that later when they eyes are closed they know what they can do and how they can be used
  • Intuitive warm up but with a structure 
  • Continuity, staying with it and in it

 

Personal Story

I had issues with my eyes since I was a child. Nothing serious, just very shortsighted, which means that I can't see from far. At this point it's so high that without my glasses I can barely see anything. I do regular check ups to make sure that nothing else is developing. Every appointment I had with my eye doctor went fine, there was nothing to be concerned about but the pressure of my eyes, which is quite high. It wasn't getting higher but it was staying high. This is quite common for very shortsighted people yet it's not good. If the pressure gets too high, if it gets beyond the healthy ragnge it can lead to diseases and can even cause loss of vision. In that case medication might have to be taken or even a surgery has to be done. What is more, there are certain things that can increase the pressure of the eyes, making them more prone to development of diseases and that includes certain aspects of dance. For example, my doctor told me that being upside down such as doing handstand or headstand is not recommended, constant falling or doing sudden movements. This means that I have to adjust my dancing if I don't want to increase the pressure in my eyes and put them at a higher risk of damaging them. This really hurt me, because my doctor also said that maybe I should slowly go away from dancing or do it less extreme.

Visual Medical Inspirations

a) Perimeter                  b)Visual field test results                c) Hot air balloon eye test                  d) Measuring the refracting error of an eye                  e) Optical coherence topography test results 

 

c)

d)

Research with Jaidy

  • One person with eyes closed one person with eyes open
  • Powerdynamics
  • The challnges one faces when being with someone with disability, (in this case, vision loss)
 
The other day I did some research with a friend of mine that I met in a project outside of school. I already made "Smell & Smile" which was a solo piece revolving around the topic of my eyes and I wanted to see what will happen when I take this with me and explore it in a duet setting. I wanted to research what will come up when one person will have their eyes open and one closed, which I saw as that the person with the eyes closed lost their vision and the one, with their eyes open, is taking care of them. On the videos below you can watch short fragments from that research.

a)

Voice Research

  • Movement influencing the voice
  • Movement being the fuel but also the editor of the voice
 
One day I was in a studio for some dancing. I did not have anything specific in mind that I wanted to research, I simply wanted to get into a trans, to fully get into my body and mind. It started with some abstract movement and ended up with playing with my voice. I was quite shocked I got to that place because using my voice is very uncomfortable for me and really out of my comfort zone. I almost never dare to do it, always some kind of blockage comes and I cannot release my voice. This time it got out of me and I was playing with it for at least half an hour without stopping. I found many interesting things, a few examples you can find in the videos below. I was using Polish as I felt more comfortable with it and as the words sound very intriguing and putting them together, like words that sound very similar but have various meanings, created a great sound. I played a lot with with rhythm and with some sort of stuttering. It felt like I was fighting with the words.

Scenography Research

  • Took items I had with me at school and created a small setting
  • Inspired by "Smell & Smile"
 
I wanted to try something new, something different and that's when the idea came of playing with scenography. I wanted to create a space within a space. I did not plan this ahead of time so I only used items I had with me at school. I used my boots, hat, charger, tissues, notebook, drawings and a hoodie. While picking the objects and creating the scennery, I wanted to make it seem like I am in my room and I just went through something heavy or painfull. I imagined that I wrote down something in my notebook that I don't want to read and I am just not feeling well and I don't have the enrgy to care about anything. That's why all the objects are messily placed. 

"Closed Eyes" Research Session

Procedure

(20 minutes physical research + 5 minutes writing) x 3

 

Below are the three 5 minutes writing:


Round 1

It was nice to have the eyes closed. I entered my own world and was fully in my body. I sensed the space around me and the clothes on my body. WIth my hands and feet. Touch was essential, it was as if trying to get as much information just from the sense of touch. It was very peaceful. Not anyhitng helped to stay calm and to be in myself.


Round 2

Finding the lines. The lines on the floor being my anchor point. Something I look for when I am lost in the space. When I am on the line I know I am safe. I move betwnee the lines. It's tricky because there is quite some distance between them so there is a moment of unsurness, fear and worry that I won't find the next line. Living on the edge. Or loving between the edges. Should I take the risk? Should I try? Or should I play safe? More careful? Not sure what to think.


Round 3

Playing with abstract and daily movement. Seeing what are the possibilities with a chair. What can I do with it? What kind of images can I create? The chair is my refrence point, I stay close to it but sometimes I am done. I don't want to be stuck in one spot. But if I leave I might never find the chair again/ Why do I have to live like this? Sometimes I cheated and did open my eyes. It was at times tiring to not have them.

"Smell & Smile"

  • How does one orientate themselves through space without using the sense of vision
  • Voice, exposing my thoughts
  • Daily, ordinary, snippet into my life, snippet into my journal
 
My preliminary research actually started with creating the piece "Smell & Smile", which was part of the BaCh program. In there I took my first steps regarding this topic - how it is to dance with your eyes closed, how do you orientate yourself in space when you cannot see, how does the body have to adpat and what can it rely on or use to help itself.

I   N   S   P   I   R   A   T   I   O   N                                           &          F   I   R   S   T          I   D   E   A   S

 

F   I   R   S   T          W   E   E   K                                           I   N   T   R   O   D   U   C   T   I   O   N

P  H  Y  S  I  C  A  L                                       R  E  S  E  A  R  C  H               

Cleaning up the space.

Organizing it.

To cover up what just happend. 


Changing the space. Going from the objects frowzily lying on the floor to putting them nicely and properly. It is as if I am covering something up that happend. That the verison you just saw of me - I don't want it to be seen. I want you to see the nice and clean Olga.  

Should I take it off?

Do I want to take it off?

Hoodie off.


I don't know what I want to do or what I should do. I feel like there is something wrong but I don't know what. I attmept to take off my hoodie but I hesitate for some reason. I eventually decide to take it off and expand the already created scenery in the space.

Taking the tissue.

Blowing my nose.

Putting it in my pocket.

 

In here I was simply being in the space, blending/fitting in it. I did not want to seem like I am there by mistake but that this is my space, that I belong there. I wanted to make it look as ordinary as possible. I took the tissue and blew my nose because this is something I do very often and it is also something that is very habitual.

Restless legs.

Manipulated by anxious hands.

Can't sit still.

 

Some position and same positioning as in the above video. Yet the image cretaed is very different. I want to get out of the place or even get out of myself, there is something that is unsettling me, yet I still persist and try to belong in the space, to blend in and not grab the attention.

 

Short words.

Many Ts.

And me trying to explain something.


I picked many short words that consisted only of 1 or 2 syllable and that when combined together and used on repeat give nothing to the listener. The words include (translated already into English) "this", "this with that", "this with that girl", "why", "because I", "I don't know", "actually", "somewhere", "something", "why there and not here", "here", "I want to be here and not there" to write a few.

Intrusive thoughts.

Battling them.

As they take over my body.

 

The phrase I am playing with is "nic mi nie wychodzi", which translates into "I fail at everything I do" or "everythign I do fails". This sentence came in the moment and as I was saying it, it started to really influence me both physically and emotionally. It was this intrusive thoughts that was stuck in my mind and was travelling through all of my body to find an escape.

Homonyms.

Ongoing. 

Becoming a rhythm.

 

I play with words "cześć"-"hello", "teść"-"father-in-law" and "sześćdziesiątsześć"-"sixty six". They all sound very similar and I decided to only create sentences, that do or do not make sense, in order to have the same sound occur all the time. On top of that I played with rhythm and repetition.

Own stories in shared space.

Disconnected from each other.

Palpable gap.

 

Two people in one space but each telling their own story. Not relating to each other at all, there is no connection, only that they are both going through something painful. Intimate situation, as it is only 2 people, yet it feels like a public space where each person takes care of their own things. The dissociation is very present.

Word articiluation.

Coming from the body.

Moving voice.

 

"Trzynaście traw", which means "thirteen blades of grass". I allowed my body to have an effect onto how the words ends up sounding. I esepcially put emphasis on "a" from "traw". I kept it for longer and as I was saying "a" I was abruptly moving, which made the pronuanciation go through different dynamics.

Searching for them.

They play with me.

But this is not funny.


I know he is near. I hear his movement, I feel the air passing by when he moves around me, I notice the changes of brightness when his hand is in front of my eyes. I want to feel him but he makes fun of me not being able to see him. I desperately search for him to feel save in the space.

Being watched in my own world.

Thought I was alone.

In a way I am.


I am fully in my world, expressing my emotions, letting it all out. It was because I thought I was alone, as in that Jaidy was busy with his movement exploration. I had no idea he was just sitting in front of me and observing. It created a very interested image. It's like we are connected in a way but I am not aware of if because I can't see him or feel him.

Being left.

Distance in between.

Someitmes bigger than I thought.


Playing with the distance in between each other while being aware, in opposition to the above video, that Jaidy is somewhere around. Connecting and disconnecting. Feeling save when I sense his touch and feeling uncertain when I am left alone in the black empty space of my closed eyes.

Whispers Inside My Head

  • I don't want to live if I can't dance
  • I want to see!! I want to see!
  • I don't want to lose my vision!!
  • I am scared
  • I don't know what to do
  • What if I am in class, something snaps and I won't see
  • I hope the train crashes or goes off rail and it's all over
  • Dance is all I have. Dance is my life. Dance is my love.
  • I just want to dance
  • If I can't dance then I don't know what I am going to do
  • I rather go blind but be able to dance
  • But is this ok for my eyes?

1.

III

II

I

Research Question Ideas

  • How does the body behaviour change when it has to rely on other senses other than the one of vision?
  • What does it take for the body to adjust to its limitations?
  • How can I transform a limitation into a creative potential?

e)
Physical Research Findings
  • Points of refrence/anchor points, e.g. lines on the floor or chair standing in the space
  • Affordance - what can I do with just one thing?
  • Sustained exploration, exploring my options
  • Relation with the object, relationality 
  • Searching & investigating
  • Head in upright position
  • Loose, relaxed body

1.

2.

I get a look into your daily life

 

Exposing the daily life

 

Adapting to the new reality

 

Relearning how to live

 

Disability

 

How do you communicate?

 

How important are your eyes?

 

What is so scary about losing them?

 

Is it that you won't see anything?

 

Or that you will never be able to see yourself again?

 

How is it to be with someone who can't see?

 

What are the costs?

 

What does it take?

 

Is the caretaker always there to take care?

 

Or do they also get tired at some point?

 

Is it also heavy for them?

 

Can they feel the person they are taking care of?

Ideas For The End Performance

  • Recreation of an eye doctor appointment
  • Clips of reading the letters - the letters show on the back wall and go from big to small
  • Clips of field of vision
  • Clips of the ballon that sharpens 
  • Clips of the baloon exploding
  • Lights - the stage step by step gets darker so that at the end it's black and there is only music/sound/voice, the audience experiences how it is not to see
  • Closed eyes
  • Sensing
  • Listening
  • Touch
  • Sliding
  • Hanging
  • Falling
  • Folding
  • Repetition
  • Dropping limbs
  • Daily movement
  • Shoulder engagement

b)